Foodstamp Stigma

“I wish I had a new blackberry like the women in front of me paying for her stuff with a foodstamp card!”

YOU TOO CAN HAVE THIS IF YOU JUST GET ON FOODSTAMPS!

I recently saw a gentlemen post this to a social networking site. 

 I mean, some nerve. How can ppl be so cruel and ignorant? I feel compelled to come up with a a few scenerios to proove WHY this “girl” had a blackberry AND an EBT (foodstamp) card at (GASP) the same time!!!!!!!!! Why heavens! She MUST be abusing the system! (lmao)

And besides coming up with LOGICAL reasons, I posted some other FUN ways to really annoy the cashier and other shoppers around you next time your making purchases with that EBT card.or shall I say,


1. She  might of been a very hardworking women, who was shopping for her elderly grandmother  at the market with her granmothers card, as all you need is the perosns pin number and you can purcashe alloted items. Hense, She has a cell phone AND a food card at the same time! wow, magic!

2. she has worked the last 15 years of her life, purchased the phone dring that time. has been laid off for 2 months, still has her phone and just recently got on foodstamp benefits so she dont like, uhh starve until she gets back on her feet. Maybe the phone was a gift? bday gift from her weathly family? just cuz you get ebt dont mean you need to have the cheapest tracphone out there.

3. maybe her best friend owns us. celluar? maybe her best friend gave her a phone just becasue shes totally awesome? Yeah, This is probably the reason

4.  maybe she DOES work! Ever think of that? Maybe shes a college student and needs an ebt card until she gets thru college and starts working? Maybe becasue shes in college her family help her out with a few bills? Is there something wrong with this?  just becasue you work dont mean you cant get beneits! the state decides how much you shoud have monthly based on what you make. have you ever been to dds? its not a fun place if you didnt HAVE to be there. I dont think you would go and go thru all that hassel and social stignma just for some free milk and eggs a few times a month. its not like you can buy anything good on it like hot food, cigs and tolettires! lol

5. So, maybe with her 3 part time jobs, shes saved enough money to buy a cell phone, after paying her bills every month. I can tell you  its never enough. they can give you a grand a month for a family of five and it barely cuts it. have you ever seen the food prices? Not cheap.  you usually always  end up paying alot more money to the market after your ebts are gone for that month.  and, if shes a grown owmen, whom is honest and hard working, damn it she deserves that cell phone, and i think we established above, her best friend gave it to her.

6, another sceneio. maybe it IS HER card but not her phone? maybe its her sisters phone, and her sister it letting her borrow it becasue her car isnt running well ( becasue well, all us poor folk drive beaters right?) and she wanted her poor sister, (no pun intended)  who has no phone to have it in case of emergency while out shopping for her elderly grandmother. lol.

7.maybe she found it in the parking lot and was taking it back into the store to see if any of them rich folk lost it.

8.maybe she won it???Maybe she won it in an EBT drawing of some sort?

9. Maybe shes sold her foodstapts to pay for it? oh wait, thats only what a judmental person would assume. Scratch that

10 Maybe her rich grandfather just has a sudden heartattack and died, and gave all his grandchildren all his belongings which included an awesome new cell phone?

11. Maybe her hot, rich boyfriend bought it for her? Becasue if shes not married, then he dont go on her EBT Application Form. It only would mater what she made. its not against the laws to have a rich boyfriend and an ebt card. now, if shes married, thats a different story. But, shes not. and like I said before, shes probably shopping for her grandmother.

well folks, i dont kno how she has a cell phone and an ebt card but I can tell you one thing you shouldnt pass judgement on someone you dont even know! there are many possibilities that could enure why she had that fancy phone that you wish you had. maybe she works harder then you and can afford it. maybe you should get a better job? maybe you should get a better boyfriend, and he would buy you one. OR maybe you should just be as awesome as her and have friends that work at us celluar that want to give you the most popular phones to annoy ppl behid you at the market?

foodstamps is nothing to be ashamed of. you cant let ppl make you feel bad, as there is nothing to feel bad for. only you know your situation and why you have the ebt benefits, Not the person behind you making ridiculous commets, not the cashier giving you dirty looks, and not the manager who is annoucing ‘ no you cant buy hot chicken on that thing!” lol

.

Next time you go shopping with your Ebt card make sure you do the following to ensure a much more fun trip!Have fun!………

  • Dress up. Put on those skinny jeans, red pumps and red lipstick Tease your hair some and make sure your diamonds are shining. Spray your new 60 dollar perfume on RIGHT before you enter the market.  Who says you have to look like a bum just because you’re receiving government assistance?  Dress classy, dress trashy…dress however you want, as long as it looks like it didn’t come from the dumpster behind pizza hut.  Don’t forget to accessorize, preferably with some REAL bling-gold, silver (or better yet, platinum) I dont care if its fake, put it on! And rock it momma!
  • Judgemental folks think you keep popping out kids so you get more jumk food money. Dont let the judgmental folks down; bring as many kids as you can with you! If you don’t have children, borrow some. take your nieces, nephews, neighbors kids, Stop at the local park and bring those kids too. Feel free to bribe them; candy bars are EBT-approved! Also, its better if they look real dirty and cruuddy so let em play in the mud before marketing. that will get extra stares. BONUS POINTS: FOR ATTATCHING THEM TO THOSE CHILD LEASHES AND PULLIN THEM ALONG
  • Ramen Noodles are cheap, so don’t even think about putting that crap in your cart!  Load up on lobster, crab meat, delmonico steak, organic banannas, fresh Veggies,  and fancy looking birthday cakes.    Also, it’s okay to purchase large amounts of junk food; the cashiers (and the nosy customers in line behind you) want to know that their tax dollars are being well spent Grab a few bags of chips and dip, little debbie cakes, and some of those 5 pound bags of M&M’S You have kids to bribe remember!!! Oh, dont forget the  pie! Lots of pie!
  • After you’ve selected everything that you want/need,  Start selecting items that are not eligible to be purchased with food stamps; “hot” foods such as the roasted chicken from the deli or a cup of cappuccino (which you should be sipping on when you reach the register to pay) from the coffee bar.  Make your way towards the household items, and load up Febreeze, candles, clorox wipes (for those dirty kids of yours) and lots of tampons and condoms. Oh wait, you dont use condoms, that would prevent you from getting more money!  Bonus points for selecting   your favorite wine and a pack of cigarettes! make em marlboro or dont get em!
  • Walk slowly towards the checkout; you don’t want to overexert yourself by pushing such a heavy cart!  Set a few items on the conveyor belt, and then stop to answer your cell phone (it better be a Blackberry, iPhone, or Sidekick). If its not really ringing pretend it is. Then loudly exclaim,Sure I can come to your party this weekend!No, I dont work! Sure I can get all of the shrimp and beer!”  Ignore the dirty looks from the cashier and other customers.  Who do they think they are, the Line Police?  They can wait.
  • Ask the cashier what they are doing this weekend.  If they say they will be working (and 99% of the time, that’s the response you will get; cashiers are rarely lucky enough to score a Monday through Friday, 8a.m.-5p.m. schedule), act horrified.  Announce that your BEST FRIEND THAT OWNS US CELUAR IS HAVING THE MOST AWESOME PARTY this weekend  , and were hoping they could make it.  Sigh loudly and exclaim that you are soooooo happy that you don’t have a job. woot woot! (even tho we kno you work 2 jobs just to make ends meat.that dont make the other shoppers feel good, so keep that to your poor self.
  • Act completely shocked when the cashier informs you that toiletries and cigerettes are not eligible for food stamp purchases.  Stomp your feet, roll your eyes, hand on the hip,  throw a hissy fit, and scream that you’re sick of people disrespecting you just because you’re on EBT. UGH! UGH! UGHHH!  Insist that the LAST time you went grocery shopping, your items were all approved.  Demand to see a manager   When the manager arrives, ignore him while you answer your phone again..
  •  Make sure the kids make a big mess in the cart. ebt kids are dirty, and their clothes never match. and they dont ever have their hair done. Or at least thats what the judgemental folks think. let em see it baby! lol.

Her parents must recieve foodstamp benefits right?? it cant be possible that a child would get dirty just becasue shes a child!  yeah, she must get goverment assisted dinners. (uggh! lol)

  •  have them put their cookie crumbs that you used to bribe them with all over the place. make a trail of them I dont care. have the kids throw the empty wrappers on the ground. Familys who get foodstamps live like apes right?  and, you must absolutly make sure a few of them are whining. pinch one of  them if you have to. other shoppers hate loud whiny kids. ESPECIALLY LOUD WHINING KIDS WHOSE PARENTS ARE PAYING FOR THEIR GROCIERIES WITH FOODSTAMPS!
  • something like this would be good!^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

 

  • When the cashier asks if you have any coupons, laugh loudly and say, “Girl, please!  I’m on EBT…everything in my basket is already free!”.  Make sure she notices your Coach bag.
  • Encourage the cashier to hurry up and finish your transaction.  Your tryin to make it to bonton for the latest fashions deals
  • Demand a bagger to carry your items to your car .  Explain that you’ve had a busy day of lounging by the pool Shopping for new furniture  and watching Maury and your just to darn tired to carry 18 bags of goverment paid food to the car.  Be sure to whine that your new 300.00 red pumps are killin your feet.

 

  •   Loudly scream to all of the children you brought that it’s time to go.! Breathe a sigh of relief when you remember that you just brought a ton of kid cuisince meals, goldfish crackers  and NON ORGANIC bananas, and your going home to pop one in the oven becasue your no super mom and your way to tired to cook a big meal tonight.

 

  • Ohhh, and if you borrowed anyone elses children now is the time to return them You dont wanna have to feed them too do you? And you dont need a kidnapping charge.

 

I hope people can understand that having foodstamps does not mean that you are lazy, or poor, or worthless, or no good. Some people have them becasue they are disabled. Some people have them becasue they need a liL extra help supporting their family. (YES, EVEN WITH 3 JOBS) Yes, you can get foodstamps if you have a job. I kno many families who work, and STILL have foodstamps. You might not get 1079.00 a month, but you will get what you are ELIGABLE FOR BY STATE GUIDELINES.

All you can do is go to your local social service office and apply. You may be surprised that YES, EVEN YOU are actually eligable for foodstamps! If ya never applied, you have no idea. Your probably making fun of people who are of the same social class! wow, wouldnt that be funny. bahahahaha.

Its funny, the persons(s) who judge may be eligable theirself! and geez, I wonder what they would do if they were eligable? GASP, Would they ( ANOTHER GASP) actually GO INTO SOCIAL SERVICES and ADMITT they need help!?

damn right they would. then they could see what its like being on the otherside.

gotta go, I got to find my red pumps and go buy candy bars.

TilNextTime

❤ AshNicole

 

Will This Help, paint the picture?

Alot of times I get asked to describe what it is like, to have a child with a disability. To help others, try and understand, how it is soooo much different then raising a child, without any health concerns.  I  have full advantge of comparing the two-as I have two sons, who are healthy. And a beautiful, daughter, who has cerebral palsy.  So….after 6 years now, of parenting, I have lived in both worlds.

When you’re preparing to have a new baby, it’s like planning a long awaited, well deserved, vacation. Lets say, to the Bahamas. After going to every bookstore, and buying every guide they have for the Bahamas, you make your plans. Snorkling, and some deep sea diving. Garden of the “Groves” &  Lucayan National Park  Not forgetting a trip to the International Bazaar. You may even learn some “bahama slang” .It’s all very EXCITING,and you cant wait to get there!!

You count down the days. . As the departure day draws near, you can hardly contain yourself. You get your luggage packed.And the day finally arrives. Off you go, with your straw hat and flip flops, and fake tan. Bahamas , here I come!

Hours pass, and you finally hear” Welcome To Flordia!!!” “You have reached your destination!”

“FLORDIA!!!???” “I am not getting off, Im not supposed to be in Flordia!!!  I  am supposed to be deep sea diving with my husband right now! All I ever wanted in my life, was to go to the bahamas!!! I PLANNED FOR THIS! I DID NOT prepare for Flordia!

But, No!! ….you are now in Flordia. There has been a change in the flight plans. There is no possible way now, to get to the Bahamas. It is too late now.

The important thing is that they haven’t taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It’s just a different place .

You must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met in the Bahamas.

It’s just a different place. Not a bad place.  It’s slower-paced than the Bahamas. Less Flashy then the Bahamas. But after you’ve been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around…. and you begin to notice that  Flordia  has windmills….and  the bahamas have tulips. You even get to appreciate things more, because it takes longer  to get around in Flordia,   then it ever would in the bahamas. So, you get to see alot more.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from  the Bahamas, and they’re all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there . And for the rest of your life, you will say  “Yes, that’s where I was supposed to go. That’s what I had planned.” “I wonder what it would of been like?”

And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away… because the loss of that dream,  is a very very significant loss. A loss that will always be in the back of your head, at the worse times.

But… if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn’t get to the Bahamas,  you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very
lovely things … about Flordia.

Flordia  is a stunning place, there are so many things here that I would never have seen if I had gone straight to the Bahamas.  It has made me appreciate the things in life that the others take for granted. I have been here with Grace Nicole, and the rest of my family   for  almost 4 years now!  but the dream of  getting to the Bahamas,  for  her  and for me, has never left my heart.  Grace settled into Flordia, better then I did. Quicker then I did. She had a smile on her face, as soon as we got to Flordia.And decided that she was going to make due, with what she had.   She has shown such determination, a positive attitude and an inner strength, that  I can only be proud of ,and learn from. A parent is supposed to be a childs hero. But, I  can honestly say,that my 3 and a half year old daughter, is my hero.

We heard about a visa for  “The Bahamas”  just over 6 months ago. And that  visa is called, ” Selective Dorsal Rhizotomy”. After alot of tears, sleepless nights, thinking,  research, more tears, and a team of great Doctors, We have decided to apply for the Visa. But, we cant do it alone. We cant make it to the Bahamas all by our sleves. We need the help from all our family, our friends, and maybe even some  strangers. We need help, so that one day, my daughter can live in the Bahamas, swimming, and riding her bike, and going to dance class, just like all the other kids.

And with everyones help, working together, Grace can finally see how its like, to live, in the Bahamas.

Thank you to everyone who is always there, to support us. Always here, to listen, when I need to talk. Always here, caring, about my stay in Flordia, always here to work with Grace, and provide me with all the info I need to make the best life In Flordia. I just want all of you to know, that It means the world to me.  All of my friends, and family. Everyone at the Hyndman Ministry Center. Crystal, and Pastor Leydig, Susan, Holly and Mickie Grylls, all of you. Yous all welcome us in, like family. Yous are all beyond wonderful. Just plain admirable. I love you all. A special thanks to  All of Graces teachers;Ms,LuAnne, Mrs. Linda, Mrs. Donna. The 3 best teachers I know. Because they dont treat Grace any different then the other kids, and they dont treat her like a student. They treat her, as if she was their own daughter. They hug her and kiss  her, and show her love. Also, all her therapists at school,  & Her therpaist at the League-Melissa. She is great. Always so patient with Grace, and caring. She is very smart, and I feel very lucky, that Grace has her as a physical therpist.  AND ALSO,  Dr. Keating, from Childrens National Medical Center- In DC. Along with him, Dr. morozova, who will be perfoming her botox surgery on May.18th 2011.  EVERYONE at childrens in D.c They are all so kind, caring and compassionate. I just have to thank you all. everyone reading this. thank you. One day, i will show you, somehow, just how grateful & thankful, I am to have you in my life.

I love you Gracie Girl. I thank God everyday, that he chose me and your daddy, to be your parents. He trusted that we would  handle it all. And even though there are times, where I dont know if I can handle much more, he gives me strength, and proves me wrong. With God, all things are possible. Because your life is in his control. You are not in charge! Your life will be what its meant to be. And Only God knows, what that is. He knew, that before I could make it to the bahamas, I had to stop in Flordia. He is, thy driver. Im just along for the ride.
                             .

Four Weeks, For “That??” How Disappointing……

"A.F.O.'s"

This blog entry is slightly longer then usual……. just a warning!!!…:)

Why are some people so careless in their jobs, that they don’t care if the (wrong) outcome, hurts people?
Even when it comes to kids? Example…. Grace went to see her Pediatric  orthopedic Specialist. After his evaluation, he recommended putting her back in braces. Or, A.F.O’s, for short. (Ankle -foot-orthosis) Basically, it keeps her foot & ankle in the position it “should” be in, if she didnt have cerebral Palsy. They are lightweight, made of plastic and customized to her liking with decor and color. They fit in her regular shoes,and really aren’t all that bad.
There are a few different types of A.F.O.’s. But for Grace there is 2 options.  A “HINGED” or UNhinged. Right now, in her development, we have done passed the “UNhinged stage” and she needs the hinged type brace. So, well her Dr. that she saw that day, wrote her a script for new braces. We were very excited, and couldnt wait to get them for her. At our next chance we took her to the brace place in Cumberland. Alberts. Alberts Orthotics. First, they cast her. Just like if she would be casted for a broken ankle/leg or foot. They then cut the cast to remove it, and SEND it out to another place called “Cascades” where they assemble the brace.
FOUR  WEEKS go by.
Will tell me that Alberts called. Grace can come in for her fitting , her braces are in. We got excited. Grace was excited to get her new “pink braces” Her princess shoes we call them. So, we go in, see the braces. They looked good…….pretty……and all the colors were right, that we ordered for the inside, the straps, etc. Something looked off tho, but I couldnt quite figure it out. Well, we got them, went home and talked them up, hoping she would want to wear them. Since shes been out of them for so long now, I figured she wouldnt take to them well. I was right. We got home, and I got one on her. It was like wrestling a horse in a 3X3 ft room. She refused up and down.” NO no no NO!!!” She screamed. I got one on. she took one-off. I gave up. There was nothing I could do. it was late, and I just figured she had therapy the next day and maybe her therapist could bribe her into wearing them.  Then, I notice, along with her grandmother, what was wrong. THEY WERE NOT THE RIGHT KIND OF BRACE ALL TOGETHER!!!
We just picked up, after waiting for 4 weeks, a regular afo. Not a “Hinged afo” lthe hinged one, has movement in the back, it isnt solid, where the back of the unhinged one is solid plastic. there would be no flexing of the ankle in the solid brace. And Grace needs that. She can NOT wear a brace that is solid!!!! People with kids that wear these totally understand what I mean. But, Im not asking you to understand all the fine print on orthotics. My point is this.
it took 4 weeks to get these in. We waited, and waited as patiently as I could. I rushed down there going 70 mph, to pick them up the day they were delivered. Only to discover that some idiot, careless person messed them up. How could this have been prevented??
READ THE PRESCRIPTION!!!!!!!!!!! AND THEN………READ IT AGAIN!!!!!!!! still not sure?? read it a 3rd time. Dont start the process on a very expensive piece of equipment, if you’re not een sure what your supposed to be making. So, we waited 4 weeks, to pick up braces that Gracie could not wear. Yeah, I understand people make mistakes. sure. I have. You have. I will. You will. But, this is just carelessness. AND, the 2nd or 3rd time I have had issues, dealing with these people.
But, what are ya gonna do when you live somewhere that don’t give you to many options on where you can get your kids braces made?Not much, ill tell ya that.
So, the next day we go to therapy. Her WONDERFUL , AWESOME therapist, at the League For Crippled Children, advised us to not put them on her, heck, her feet wont even go in them properly. Well, thats because they made her something that she didnt need. and obviously cant even wear. even if she wanted to. The therapist got right ont he phone, with the people who sent out the order.
I then got a call from them, later that day. read this—–> its to funny. our phone conversation with these ppl.
ring ring yells the phone.
“Hello???” I knew it was them, so I wasnt very cheerful.
“Uhh yes..we recieved a call, from uhh.ummmmmmm.
“Melissa!!??” I asked….
“Yes, umm melissa, she said that your braces were made incorrectly.”
“Duhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!” (no really, I didnt say that, but I wanted to.” “Uh huh” I told her.
“Well, I got good news!” … said the overly pleasant person on the other end. “We got a hold of the people who made the first set of afo’s and they said that they would make you a new pair FREE OF COST RIGHT AWAY!!”
She told me this as if I was going to jump for joy, clean outta my britches!! lol. like, well okay hopefully so, given they just screwed up this pair, and it took them 4 weeks to mess them up!!! they couldnt even get them right, in 4 weeks!! Of course their gonna make me a new pair free. I didnt mess them up. Santa Claus didnt mess them up. Jack and Jill didnt mess them up. They did. they will do them for free.
She seemed saddened that I was not more enthused about this “terrific” news, butI didnt care. I asked her if they would take 4 weeks to get here, and she said, “No, they’re working on them right now for you.” Well, that was about 2 weeks ago. And I havent heard anything yet. So, I guess Ill have to call them and start a fire under their rear ends to get em hoppin.  I am not the Queen of England so I dont expect royal services, , But, Im also not waiting 4 weeks to get another pair that should have been RIGHT THE FIRST TIME.
I never did find out whose fault it was. was it the persons fault who sent the order out. Did they send out the right order? The order that told ther manufacturer  what to manufacture? Or was it the company that actually builds.makes. and/or puts them together?? Did they read it wrong? DID THEY READ IT AT ALL? Who knows. All I know is that somewhere along the line a miscommunication problem has presented itsself once again.  some people in this world just dont care. Some people go into work, and do their 8 hours , go home and never to think about it again. They go home at the end of the day, and dont have to live with the problems they have created by their careless acts of crappy job skills. If the bad outcome, dont affect them directly, then who cares right? Who cares if they are making a 3 year old child with c.p wait 8 WEEKS, For one pair of new braces.  Its just an accident to them. A Mistake. They apologize and its okay. They tell me that they’re sorry and Im supposed to feel different?? Well darlin, I dont I forgive that person for messing up. Of course I do. You have to be merciful. But, It still sucks that if that ONE person would have done  their job correctly, My daughter would have her new braces on and benefitting from them. But she dont. We are still, in the midst of waiting….waiting waiting waiting. A game that parents of special needs children, know way to much of. Sometimes it feels that we always get the “Lose A Turn” Card. Guess ya gotta play what your dealt. Make the best out of it, and keep on smilin’
Sorry this is so long, But thank YOU, for traveling along with us, during this journey.
God Bless You all , Today & Always.
Love,
AshGraces braces. left is the old,. the ones she outgrew. On the right is what is being made now. you can see the difference in the two. in the back. The old one, and the one on the left is NOT a hinged afo. the one on the right, however IS. She can  move and flex and bend at the knees with this one. Next stop on the list. Shoe shopping. Finding shoes to fit over these things is not easy.

A marriage certificate. ” Its just a piece of paper” ………

Just a piece of paper”

marriage certificates

Have you heard anyone use that “saying” as an excuse to not marrying their partner? Whom, usually, they have been with for some time allready? Or may even be living with?? ” Oh hunny, we dont need to get married, its just a piece of paper anyways” I love you babe!!!” We dont need a piece of paper to tell us we love each other! Well, I have. I have heard it alot actually.  Most of the time I hear it come outta the male being. ( But, I have heard women say it alot as well)

Sorry folks, that just dont make much sence to me………A Marriage lisence is NOT just a piece of paper.

A car title, a lease to ones rental unit, a deed for the home in which you live, a high school diploma, or even  a G.E.D, are all written on paper. An award for recognition is normally written on paper. Those items are of value right? People put a value on those peticular  “pieces of paper.” they cherish them, and feel proud to have them. SO, TELL ME, would you hear someone say,” I dont wanna buy a home! Its just a piece of paper  that says I own  a home whats the big deal?”  ” Ill continue to sponge off my parents/grandparents/siblings, forever.” You see where Im going right?No one would call a  house deed, , “Just a piece of paper”  And personally, I feel a mkarriage lisence is MORE important then a deed to a home. (personal opinion tho)

Anyhow, All of the above things listed, like the diploma, or even your childs birth certificate are all ON paper. Does that change the value of the item???Does it mean that we shouldnt be PROUD of these “Pieces of paper???” Just because they are written or typed on “paper”

…………..NO!!!………….. NO NO NO NO NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A Marriage lisence is Printed on paper, yes. But, the meaning and value of that “paper” exceeds commitment and love for your husband/wife.

Guys, its not just a piece of paper, ( that will change everything if you sign it) It is your proof ,  to yourself, and partner,  that says, I will commit to  you and only you til death do us part.  It says you are now leagally married , and the Two of you, become one. Who wouldnt want a document like that????

. p.s it wont change everything. paper dont change marriages. people change marriages.

Just a piece of paper reminds me of:

A) That of a Child beging his mother or father  for a piece of drawing paper while waiting impatiently at a DR. Appt. He only wants a piece of paper to color on mom!!! ………..or……..

B)It makes me invision long time friends who finally meet up again after years of not seeing each other, digging thru their purses to find a scrap “piece of paper” to jot down the others phone number on. Scrap piece of paper. Good for ripping corners from for phone numbers,

C) Litter, trash, or even  garbage. Cleaning out a junk drawer, tossing old old pieces of paper, no longer needed. hmm, would you ever toss out your “piece of paper marriage certificate”???

D) something of no importance, care, or value. maybe its because of the word “JUST”, in that equasion. Just a piece of paper..hmm…yeah, the “Just” needs to go.

Now, Do any of those examples, (or other wise, my own personal opinions on what I think about when I hear “Just a piece of paper” ) Sound like marriage bliss? Love ?? Committment?? Nope, I dont think so!!

SO, guys, ( and some girls) Before, you go out, and say….”Ahhh well, why get married? I kno I love my wife / husband!! I dont need a paper to tell me that!

Then hunny I strongly suggest ya go and evaluate things. Because that sounds like a commitment issue. Why????

Becasue, if you say, ” its just a piece of paper, it wont make anything different, we still love each other.” Then go get married!!! Whats it gonna change right?? You love her, she loves you. Its just a piece of paper. Because it has meaning, thats why. Marriage does not “start” because you have a piece of paper. And the old myth that states, ” Im not getting married, that will cause a divorce and cause us to hate each other, im haooy being un married” well, sorry to bust your bubble, but PAPER dont RUIN MARRIAGES!!!!!!!!!!!!! Husbands, or wives ruin marriages. lots of things can cause divorce. But, I can honestly say, signing a piece of paper, willl NOT cause your marriage to fall apart.

Tip To guys: Dont call it “Just a piece of paper” , when talking to your future  wife. Discuss the REAL reason why your scared to get married. yes I said scared! Because its true isnt it??? what is it?  Is it commitment? Fear of a divorce? Maybe your a child of a divorce?? maybe you feel cursed? I dont kno, im not the one callin it that! lol. But,  Whatever it may be……… BE – HONEST. Thats the best policy. Especially if your talking to your future wife or husband.

Before I end this I have to say something to soneone………

I love you Will!!!! For the last 7 and a half years, I have loved you more and more every new day.  I hope you know what our marriage lisence means to me. Because its almost un descirbable. The ammount of joy I have when I realize that I get to spend the rest of my life with you  . Atfer (almost)  8 years, I love you more and more each day. When I think that I cant love you anymore, you do something to prove me wrong. You never fall short of amazing me.  I  Love. You . So. So. Very. Much. Your the only one for me. The only one God created for me. Thank you Father God for letting me find the man you have created just for me.You knew who my soulmate was, before I did. But now, I know too.  Thank you.  Thank You. Thank you.

I Love YOU, only YOU, always YOU.

God Bless All.

love,ash

I believe…………

“I BELIEVE”……….

was my random prompt today. I guess im just supposed to finish the sentance? lol. thats what ill do.

I Believe………..

I believe life is good. I believe we are all equal. I believe everyone is weird in their own way.I believe that my kids are  awesome, beautiful, and  intelligent kids. I believe that some people just have to make their own decisions, and others shouldbt butt into ones life is not welcome. I believe that the school system should make kids wear school uniforms. I believe in fate. I believe in  “Karma”…….I believe In freedom of speech. I believe that if you have had 5 kids, and the state took away all 5 kids, you shouldn’t be ALLOWED to have another child.  Until you PROOVED you have changed, got those 5 back, and then, have extreme counseling I believe in having the right to form your own religion&beliefs (or not) I believe that men and women shouldn’t have children when they dont “really” want them, i believe that there are to many mothers and fathers out ther,e who thought they was ready for children, had therm, and now dont take care of them, I believe that 19 kids is way to many, and the “DUGGARS” treat their daughters like slaves, as they are kids, not “little mothers” I believe that if “Jon and kate “can have a tv show just becasue they have multiples twice, that i should have a tv show, for having a set of multiples, with one being disabled, as I go thru many many struggles myself.  I would show the challenges, hardships and rewards of taking care of a child with a handicap. I believe that I wouldnt want to have a camera crew in my home , capturing my most intimate moments, all the time. and I believe I rather write a book about it.

I believe that you should treat everyone how you wish to be treated. I believe in teacing my kdis to be nice to EVERYONE. not just the “coolkids” or the kids who are “cool” Be nice to all kids. be nice to all of Gds creations.

I believe that money cant make you happy. You can use money to buy nice things, and money can let you go on a nice cruise ship to the Florida keys in the dead of winter, BUT, that trip will eventually come to an  end. and I believe you will n nee to keep spending and spending, to fulfill that happiness, hence, that will make the money  be gone,  therefore, MONEY itself , CANT make one happy. I believe that the female and male sex CAN be friends, with out being “more then friends”…...I believe some of the BEST relationships, are between a guy and a gal.

I believe that A clean room is a happy rom! lol. ( so my kids think anyhow) I believe In miracles. As I have experienced a few myself. I believe in the power of prayer, as Jesus has answered many of my “Big” Prayers.  I believe in tough love. Sometimes, ya just gotta give tough love. I believe that there is no such thing as “normal” Only whats “Normal for ones self” I believe in soul mates, ❤ as I have found mine 7 years ago. I believe that kids change your life forever, and  for the better.I believe that kids should be on good bedtime routines and good daytime schedules. I believe that some parents could care less. I believe in giving kids homework ( but not overloading them) I believe in

I believe in people telling the truth, the truth will set you free. I believe that lying, only makes things worse. I believe in my family and friends, and trust my family with all my heart. I believe in free will, and people making their own choices as God gives us free will.  I believe in marriage, love and fidelity. I believe in kindness, generosity, and charity, especially voluntary aid to others in need. I believe in giving when you have even very little yourself. If you give, you will be given to, by the Lord.

I believe that two faced people are not my type  of person. I dislike people who talk to you and then talk about you. I do not like people who think they are better then everyone. And I believe that when someone has that attitude of “Im better then you” They are really just insecure and unhappy with their own lives, that they are “living” a fairy tale life, that is fake. I believe that “fake” people think they are better then everyone. but they are not. I believe in 2nd chances.

I believe that men can do dishes, women can do year work, i believe that women can go to work, and the man  can stay home.  I believe that REAL men do housework! lol. I believe that a women can go hunting. I believe that siblings should be the best of friends. I believe people shouldn’t throw litter on the ground. I believe that the bulling in the school system NEEDS to be stopped, someway somehow. I believe that one person can make a difference. I believe that no one should be denied healthcare. I BELIEVE THAT the president of USA can be fixing this, and hes not.

I believe there are alot of dumb shoes on tv. lol. I Believe that tabloids are funnty to think about, but not important enough to spend money on. I believe that evberyone should have a job they love, but just be lucky to have a job. I believe actions speak louder then words. I believe that everything happens for a reason.  I believe in ABILITY not DISABILITY.

as you see, there are many things I “believe” in. or just believe. there are about 689,000 more, but, we all believe in something. what is something you believe in???

GodBless

AshNicole